Family Farm

I know some of you are animal lovers. For 3507 years now my family has been keeping a pretty big flock of a mixture of special animals. We saved them as kind of a hobby. When the book of Job came out, Behemoths became the rage. My dad bought one at an auction and he’s had it ever since. He said it may be a collectible some day. Man he got that right. I don’t think it will ever die. The thing is cursed or something. Our hay bill is outrageous, but since we feed it instead of tithing it’s probably cheaper in the long run. I did some sketches since they don’t like being photoed. Ever since dads daguerreotype caught on fire they hide from the camera.

He also bought a Leviathan as a baby. We kept it in a small pool so it didn’t get big. They’re like goldfish and stay small if you hold back the food and keep the pool small. It’s a nasty little thing but dad likes it since it talks a lot. I’m pretty sure this would be the beast from revelation, so keeping it small is probably the best thing.

When dad was just a kid he picked up a serpent looking thing in the garden. He says it used to talk to him, but sometimes I just think dad talked to it a lot when he was little. It’s about as smooth as a used car salesman though.

His pet dragon is the coolest of them all. Frickin thing is ancient and still lays eggs. I was raised on them. We never need matches or anything. I tried to get dad to convert its stall to a thermal breathing heater but he never did. All that energy wasted all these years. He says he bought it from a guy on Patmos Island? Where is that any way?

Well, there’s more but I have to go out and feed. I lost a finger last week to that fuckin cockatrice so I feed it last just to piss it off. Little bastard!