Honesty and Christian apologetics is the fifty first shade of grey. Advancing the lords work requires the utmost skill and knowledge, and serious fudging of the truth from time to time. “I don’t know” is an ok answer, but confirming any personal doubt or lack of knowledge is not the apologist way. No chink in the armor of god can be displayed.
As I can only speak for myself, here is why I immersed myself in apologetics–Doubt, Doubt, Doubt! Doubt is what puts you into apologetics. After many years of innocent faith you investigate below the surface and come to the crossroads of doubt. Next, spend the rest of your life trying to prove you’re not naive and gullible. I spent 20 years reading Qumran, Nag Hammadi, Dead Sea scrolls, and miles of Bible commentary and scripture trying to find proof and validation. I never did. But in Christianity the conversion process is to “believe” before you know the details, then apologetics takes the rest of your life wading through cleverly worded arguments trying to prove yourself right. Faith, them knowledge, then doubt, is the fuel that keeps Christian apologetics alive. And doubt is inevitable when there is no substance but supernatural hearsay.