DeConversion Hotline

Tired of your old, worn, outdated and mean god? If you’ve seen through the the double talk and the contradictions, if you’ve prayed to no avail, if your tired of defending the invisible god that’s just not there, and your sick of trying to rationalize everything you believe, call Atheist International. Our deconversion experts are standing-by to take your call. 01-884-NOMORE-BS. For an atheist specialist press 1. To get help to be a real Humanist, press 2, and for Agnosticism press 3. Learn quick tips on how to talk ambiguity Free for the next 30 years. Rid yourself of guilt and mental baggage today. Call now!! Operators are standing by.

Ubi sent this to me. I guess there is a real hotline too. Here is the link


Author: jimoeba

Alternatives to big box religions and dogmas

30 thoughts on “DeConversion Hotline”

  1. Who makes these changes?
    I shoot an arrow right.
    It lands left.
    I ride after a deer and find myself
    chased by a hog.
    I plot to get what I want
    and end up in prison.
    I dig pits to trap others
    and fall in.

    I should be suspicious
    of what I want.


    Liked by 1 person

        1. I wonder how busy they are? As this is a humor piece and you and I know a bit about lds missionaries, i thought a white shirt and tie with a name badge and we could go door to door and share the un-gospelizing techniques we’ve learned. You game?

          Liked by 3 people

  2. I’m starting my own business to help counter stuff like this: Apologist In A Box. Just Goggle; pay me 45.99, and I’ll send you a box decorated with pieces of the original Shroud of Turin. Once the box is opened, a little version of William Lane Craig pops out and immediately begins doing mental gymnastics so profound and so incredible, that your head will literally spin like Linda Blair’s in the Exorcist. If you think you’re confused now about how difficult the English language can be to understand at times, just WAIT til little WLC gets through talking to you about 1.) The origins of the universe, 2.) Transubstantiation, 3.) 3 Gods in 1, and 4.) What type of sandal was Christ wearing on the day he was crucified. Order one quick, cause I’m selling out fast. If you order before Easter, I’ll toss in an “original” crown of thorns absolutely free–so order now. $Amen$

    Liked by 3 people

          1. Or a Yahweh in the box who says things like, “I love all people everywhere no matter what. I literally am BEAMING with love! Now, go kill those bastards over yonder who ain’t been kissin’ my ass the way I like!”

            Liked by 4 people

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