Thrib Nigriv is the opposite of virgin birth. This is commonly known as copular denial. “I don’t know how this happened, kind of denial. Ketamine induce sexual activity brain altered denial. Denial is a clever way one maintains innocence through excuses and unlikely tales. But it also causes problems. If you give up your virginity before it’s time, remember, your cover story may change the course of history. We don’t need any more of that.
The Second Oldest Profession Is Lying About It
I came across these while rummaging through some old papyrus I found in the basement.
6 Thus saith the LORD, Verily verily I say unto you in the last days one shall rise up in a choice land across the great waters and perform secret works of darkness upon all nations of the earth. And in those days all men shall use one voice to be heard every man in his own tongue like a river to every dwelling upon the face of the earth.
7 And secret works of darkness, and lascivious defilers of their own selves at war with many nations. And no man shall know the truth as all things are confusion and strife with knowledge abounding and fleeting truth as a slippery serpent.
8 Many shall cry lo here, and lo there, as the death of all nations creeps inward, the groaning earth will rock to and fro like a ship tossed on the waves of the deep. And the rulers of men work secret combinations to ensnare all the inhabitants of the earth with gold and with silver and with precious stones while blackness pours from all the deep places filling the earth with smoke and dust in all the waste places where no man shall hide.
9. Hear ye, hear ye children of the most high god. Repent for the hour is nigh that all the valleys will be raised up, and all the mountains shall be swallowed to the great depths, and all those that slumber shall open the earth wielding the sword of justice to all those that cast their lots for the son of evil masking as righteousness as the dawn trump sounds, boasting in the wisdom of a fool.
10 If any man adds or takes away from these sayings, blessed be his name for creativity sake. Hell why not? The scribes did it all the time. Interpretation is the key to good scripture. On an interesting note, neither America or the internet are in the Bible. How did they miss that? It’s ok. I fixed it.
I was training a newly hired EMT to enter his reports in the computer, and shortly after writing a practice report we got a call to go out for an MVC. We transported a minor injury patient to the hospital and since the new guy tech’d the call, he wrote the notes. Medical people use a ton of acronyms, and as I was reviewing his report I noticed some strange ones I’d never seen before. He stated ” PT found in FPS, A/O X4 PWD, airway intact. Pt with MLLUA and ALSOF. I thought “huh”? I called him back to the office for a minute to explain. “Oh, FPS is front passenger seat”. And MLLUA is mild laceration left upper arm”, and ALSOF is “abrasion left side of face”. I said “Aaron you can’t just make shit up on these reports. No one knows what these mean except you”. There is a long list of accepted acronyms and I gave him a copy to work from. Heres a small sample. 
Aaron appears to be mixing religion and work here, since “make it up as you go” is a common tool for building credible rapport in the churches.
I’ve heard some faith promoting whoppers during my time in the church. I felt the spirit (emotion) over outright lies and fabrications. I’ve seen the faithful tie silly things together that show god is with them every step of the way. From found car keys to successful surgeries, god gets the credit. When things don’t go your way he gets a free pass. If uncle Eddy survives the heart attack,”praise god”! If he dies, god took him home to heaven. He knows what’s best for you. Right?
WARNING– What you about to read might cause you to think.
Preachers tell lies and twist stories to convince you that god is real and their religions are right. They desperately want you to believe what they believe. They will tell you things to drive your emotions. That feeling is not the spirit. It is a manipulation tactic to get devotion and keep you in faith to give themselves power and money. Do not believe it. You have been tricked by professionals that prey on people during vulnerable times in their lives. Do not buy it. You already possess everything they have to offer. It’s already in you. You can do this without the bs of a religious dogma. Waiting for god to answer your prayers is a waste of time. Time that could be spent working out your own future, free of charge and free of mental bondage.
DSRD = dumb stuff religions do
Faith + Fiction = Miracles. Here have a bible
I got a flat tire last year on a remote gravel road, and as I was changing my tire an old blue sedan came barreling up the road. I called to my dog but he was so engrossed in a hunt for field mice he wouldn’t hear me. Right as the car approached my dog bolted my way across the road and bam! The car never slowed down or stopped. My dog laid in the ditch. He was dead. I sat there. I think most of you have lost a pet before. No explanation can tell you how devastated I was. I cried. I prayed. God help me. After a little while had passed I collected myself enough to finish my tire, and just as I was about done my dog licked the back of my neck. I was in shock. In complete joy. How? No way! As I held Roger I saw a man hurry across the road and down a steep embankment. I shouted “hey”! I ran to the edge where I last saw him and he was gone. Nothing. I knew what I had seen. I knew my dog was now alive and not a scratch on him. God had sent his holy angel to help me. Thank you Jesus thank you Jesus. God hears our prayers, and in our most desperate times he is here for us. To comfort. To heal. To help.
Should I post this story on Facebook and ask for likes, amens, or shares. I could strengthen testimonies with a story like this. The problem is … it is just a story. Total fabrication. While most church stories contain a wee bit of truth, I’ve seen first hand how they grow bigger and better with time.
The churchers and their preachers embellish nearly everything they say to tug at your emotions then attribute it to god. And I’m not even close to exaggerating here. Just last week god the father and the son and the Holy Spirit visited a friend of mine in the form of three hummingbirds! What the hell do you say to that? If people are looking for miracles, they’ll get them. Or see birds. (Below is the area where none of this occurred)
TheCommonAtheist 